Oct 26, 2024

Catching Up On Regal Unlimited


It's getting close to the end of the drive-in season, so I'll have more time to take advantage of the Regal Unlimited plan to see some new movies on the big screen for the next six months.  I've gone to see a few movies over late Summer and early Fall that I haven't mentioned yet on here, so this post is to catch up on some of those films and what I thought of them.


Afraid
Blumhouse Productions (2024)
Artificial intelligence is the latest trendy antagonist in horror and dystopian fiction, and it's already getting a little old.  Afraid started off strong, but it blew most of it's potential about a third of the way into the movie.  That's when it became clear that the filmmakers aren't going for a deep or thought-provoking examination of the ways in which AI can get out of control, but instead shooting a popcorn horror flick.  There's nothing wrong with that, but M3gan already did it and they did a better job of it.  Afraid isn't bad, but I'm betting that you'll forget that you had a few weeks after you watch it.
Biopics and movies that are "based on a true story" are generally not my favorite kind of films, especially when I have some level of familiarity with the subject.  Whereas a movie like Killers Of The Flower Moon will command my attention because they're telling a story that I've never heard before, I struggle to focus on a film that has little to no element of suspense.  Movies like Oppenheimer and Ed Wood are true works of art and I appreciate them both, but I know how the story ends, so I have to make a deliberate effort to keep my mind from wandering.

I'm far from an expert on the history of Saturday Night Live, but I know enough to understand that calling its cast "the not ready for prime-time players" was more than just a marketing gimmick.  I realized going into this film that NBC expected this show to fail, and it became a massive success that is still going strong to this day, so I thought that Saturday Night would be another one of those "based on a true story" films that I'm going to drift in and out of paying attention to.  Nothing could have been further from the truth.  The pacing of this film is absolutely brilliant.  It not only held my attention, but it gave such an intense feeling of being in a panic rush that I felt a little bit of panic myself at something as simple as running to McDonald's and back to the theater before the second movie that I saw that night.

This is an incredible movie.  Even if you have only the faintest interest in Saturday Night Live, I highly recommend it.  I can't say how much of this story is true and how much was manipulated for dramatic effect, but it's a hell of an experience to sit through.  


Terrifier 3
Bloody Disgusting (2024)
This was not only my first time seeing Art The Clown on the big screen, but the first time I sat through an entire movie in which he was one of the characters.  I'm aware of the existence of All Hallows Eve and Terrifier 1 and 2, but this was one of those things where seeing memes and references to the film online made me sick of these movies before I even had the opportunity to sit down and watch them.  I had a similar experience with the 2022 horror flick Pearl.  I had seen that end credit scene of Mia Goth smiling with a psychotic look in her eyes in so many memes and animated gifs in the months after that movie came out in theaters that I was annoyed at the very thought of it.  I finally sat down to watch it this year after all of the hype had died down, and even then I had a hard time pushing back the residual annoyance so that I could sit back and letting the film tell me a story.

I started to watch the first Terrifier movie on Tubi so that I had at least some understanding of this film before going to see it in theaters, but I was distracted by other things and I ended up seeing only about the first half hour.  I had considered skipping Terrifier 3 on the big screen altogether so that I didn't start with the fourth movie in the series, but my friend Donny convinced me that it wasn't the kind of film that I'd have to see all of the previous movies in the series to enjoy, so I gave it a shot.


The only thing I really knew about Terrifier 3 going into the theater is that it was extremely gory, and it certainly lived up to that hype.  However, it wasn't the least bit terrifying.  In fact, I'm not even sure I'd classify this as a horror movie.

I'm not opposed to gore when it tells a good story, like Saw and Hostel, but the story in Terrifier 3 was so nonsensical that the violence just came across as lazy comedy.  I've heard this film described as a live action Itchy & Scratchy cartoon, and whoever said that absolutely hit the nail on the head.  This movie is gore porn.  It's mildly amusing to see once, but that's the best complement that I'm going to pay it.

The scene at the end of the film was so completely ridiculous that I almost laughed out loud in the theater.  They put such little effort into storytelling that I don't mind spoiling it.  Ok, so the main protagonist is faced with a Sofie's Choice.  She can either kill Art The Clown with a sword, or she can save her little cousin who is barely hanging on from falling into a pit to hell.  She chooses to save her cousin... ok, fine.  She runs to the edge of this hole in the ground and reaches down, but her cousin's arm is just a centimeter away from being close enough to pull her up.  Now, picture this scene.  They are in a room surrounded by window curtains that go from the floor to the ceiling.  They're not subtle.  They're huge, and they're obvious, and there are several of them within arms reach of the protagonist.  She knows she has to throw something down to her cousin to help pull her up, so what does she choose to throw down to her?  The f*cking sword!  She throws the handle of the sword down for her cousin to grab onto while she wraps her bare hands around the blade and attempts to pull her up while cutting her hands to ribbons.  Naturally, this doesn't work, and the cousin falls into hell while the stupidest final girl in horror history looks on in shock and horror.

I'm going to check out the rest of the movies in the Terrifier series one of these days, but after seeing this movie, it got bumped to the back of my watch list... right after the Sharknado sequels.


Your Monster
Vertical (2024)
This past Monday was a Mystery Movie Monday screening at Regal, and the surprise movie was a romcom horror flick called Your Monster.  I hadn't heard anything at all about this film, but it has absolutely won me over.

Your Monster reminded me a lot of another Mystery Movie Monday flick that I saw earlier this year called Lisa Frankenstein, but not in a way that made me feel like one movie ripped off the other.  They have a similar tone, and the two films would make an excellent double feature.  If I had to pick a favorite between the two, I think I'd give the edge to Your Monster.  The story has a strong message, and it left me wondering if the monster really exists, or if it's a part of her psyche that is protecting her and helping to keep her strong.


Smile 2
Paramount Pictures (2024)
This has the potential to be the next great horror franchise.  The first Smile movie had one of the most creative and effective marketing campaigns that I've seen for any horror film that was released in my lifetime.  It delivered on the big screen with a horror masterpiece that was genuinely scary from start to finish. 

The story here is about a demon that travels like a virus.  It spreads from one host to another when the virus is finished with the previous host and takes control of its body, forcing it to commit suicide in a gruesome manner in front of an eyewitness.  Seeing this act opens up the witness to allow the demon to infect their mind and to take on the witness as their new host.  The demon then feeds off of their host's fear by terrorizing them with hallucinations that are targeted to the victim's deepest fears and insecurities.  After it has fed as much as it can off of this new host, it seeks another witness and the cycle begins again.

The previous movie was the story of a psychologist whose patient passed the demon onto her.  The demon has gone through various hosts between the first and second film, and the sequel tells the story of the demon infecting a world famous pop singer with a troubled past.  The pop star in question is played by actress Naomi Scott, who does a phenomenal job in the role.  The character's fashion choices are also exactly what I would gravitate towards if I were a woman.  I guessed how the movie was going to end at around the halfway point, but that didn't hurt the experience at all because everything about the way the story was told was brilliant.  The cinematography was stunning.  The performances were all excellent.  This is a worthy continuation of a modern horror classic, and the plot device allows for this story to go on in such a wide variety of settings that it could continue for many years.  I'm looking forward to seeing where the filmmakers go from here.