Godzilla, King Kong, and the Vampire Girl

Abigail
Universal Pictures (2024)

Last night was the premier of Abigail, which stars Melissa Barrera (Sam Carpenter from the last two Scream movies) as one of a six person group who were hired Reservoir Dogs-style to kidnap a young girl to earn a $50 million dollar ransom.  Unfortunately for them, the girl in question happens to be a vampire.  It's part horror, part comedy, part mystery, and a hell of a lot of fun, and I highly recommend it whether or not you're a fan of horror movies.

Kathryn Newton (star of Lisa Frankenstein) was perfect as the group's tech expert, and she seems well on her way to a career as a horror icon.  Alisha Weir delivered a fantastic performance as the title character.  The cast also included funny performances from Kevin Durand and Angus Cloud.  This was Mr. Cloud's last film role before he passed away on July 31st of last year, and the film was dedicated to his memory before the final credits.  The film also starred Dan Stevens as the member of the gang of kidnappers who seemingly had the most to hide.  He was also in the other movie that we saw at the Regal earlier this week.

One atmospheric touch that I especially enjoyed was the film's use of an old Woody Woodpecker cartoon called Pantry Panic that Kathryn Newton's character is watching on an old beat up television.  It's a fairly creepy short that premiered in theaters on November 24th, 1941 in which the red-headed bird faces starvation after he decides that he isn't going to fly south for the winter.  It's on YouTube if you're interested in checking it out, and if you haven't heard of it and enjoy classic animation, I recommend it.

The whole movie is extremely well done.  The only mild bit of constructive criticism that I have is that I think it would have had a stronger ending if they cut off the last minute or so, right after the words "show up" in the dialogue.  It's tricky to explain without spoiling the end, but I think that will clarify what I mean to anyone who sees it without giving anything away.  The way that it ends wasn't bad or anything... it just seemed to me that it had a perfect fade-to-black/roll credits moment, and then it kept going about a minute afterward.

Mystery Movie Monday
Regal Cinemas (April 15, 2024)

We went to the Mystery Movie this past Monday, which ended up being an anime flick called Spy × Family Code: White.  I wouldn't call myself a superfan, but I have watched a good amount of anime movies and series over the years and I've enjoyed what I've seen more often than not.  I might have enjoyed this too if I was more familiar with the backstory (it is apparently based on a manga series).  We gave it 15 minutes, but it just seemed kind of hokey and neither one of us were really getting into it at all, so we skipped out and decided to go see something else instead.

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire
Warner Bros Pictures (2024)

The movie that we ended up seeing on Monday night was Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire.  If I'm being completely honest, I had no intention of going to see this in theaters.  I still haven't seen the Godzilla vs Kong movie from 2021 that this film is a direct sequel to, and the trailer made the story seem convoluted even by kaiju movie standards.  If anything, the preview was underplaying it because the story was even more ridiculous than the trailer led me to believe, but it ended up being so over-the-top that it ended up being a highly enjoyable flick.  Dan Stevens, who was one of the kidnappers in Abigail, plays a kaiju veterinarian named Trapper who starts the film off by performing some dental work on an ailing King Kong... and that's probably the least outlandish thing that took place.

If you're looking for a serious movie that makes you think deep thoughts, pass this one by.  However, if you're the kind of person who can grab a big bucket of popcorn and a large soda and have a good time watching giant monsters battling each other and destroying everything around them in the process, this is all that you're hoping it will be and more.

Confection Inception

Reese's Big Cup with Reese's Puffs
Hershey (2024)

This is a specialty version of a confection made with pieces from a cereal that was created when another company licensed the rights to make a breakfast food based on the original version of the confection.  That's some Inception-level craziness.  I wonder how many kids tried to convince their parents that they can eat them for breakfast.  Hey ma.. it's just like eating a bowl of cereal, see!

I didn't expect these to be too much different from a regular Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, but it really does change the flavor.  The Reese's Puffs cereal pieces mixed in with the peanut butter have a taste and texture that reminds me of eating a Nutter Butter.  They're pretty damn good!

Goodnight and God Bless You

Jeff Mattox
Mahoning Drive-In Theater
The owner and head projectionist of the Mahoning Drive-In Theater has passed away earlier this week due to complications from surgery.  He was a very awesome, knowledgeable, and kind man who will be missed.

Leo's Bar

Wyoming Street
Hazleton, PA (1961)
This photo of Wyoming Street (looking North from Mine Street) was recently shared on Hazleton Photos earlier this month.  Dan Maddonni dated this at either 1961 or 1962 because the new street lights were installed, but are not being used yet.  The source was not cited so I don't know where it came from or who took the photo, but it reminds me of a scene from an old movie.

More Stuff From Slatington

The Slatington Marketplace
Route 873 - Slatington, PA

These are photos from our visit to The Slatington Marketplace last month.

Bless Me, Batman, For I Have Sinned

Slatington Marketplace
Route 873 - Slatington, PA

I'm sure the placement of this merchandise on the shelves was random, but I'd like to believe that there's some lunatic child out there somewhere who prays at night to The Dark Knight.

The Keystone Lamp Factory

The Slatington Marketplace
Route 873 - Slatington, PA

I've posted pictures of the vendors and merchandise at The Slatington Marketplace before, but there wasn't really too much said about the building itself.  We arrived a few minutes before the place opened when we visited last month, so it gave us an opportunity to take a walk around the building and to take a few photos of the parts of the facility that have yet to be converted into retail space.

The Slatington Marketplace was built out of the Keystone Lamp Factory, which opened in 1932 and remained in operation for 57 years until its closure on July 10th, 1989.

Portions of the building were renovated and opened as the Bus Stop Flea Market & Antiques Center in 2008.  The business remained open every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday under that name until late 2015 when it was rebranded as The Slatington Marketplace.  They're now open from Wednesday to Sunday every week (except for Easter Sunday, Thanksgiving, and Christmas), and it's is the home of over 150 separate vendors, a farmers market, a food court.  I find awesome things at reasonable prices every time we come here, and I always end up taking a bunch of photos, some of which I'll share on here tomorrow.

Unapologetically Lame

City Connect Jerseys
Philadelphia Phillies (2024)

The Phillies City Connect jerseys were revealed last week.  If their goal was to bring the people of Philadelphia together, mission accomplished.  Fans in Philadelphia, and the rest of the baseball world, seem to be unanimous in their hatred of a uniform that looks like something a well-meaning grandmother might have ordered from a discount website for her grandkids soccer team.

The blue and yellow was chosen based on the colors of the city flag.  Let me ask you a question.  Did you know Philadelphia had its own flag?  Have you ever seen this before?  If someone showed you this, along with four other fake city flags, would you be able to pick out which one is correct?  If you answered "yes" to that last question, you are either an employee of the city, a middle school child who is currently working on a report about the history of Philadelphia, or a liar.

The black pants and the gradient jersey is pretty cool, I'll give them that, but nobody gives a damn about the city flag.  They should have gone with red.  Also, what the hell is going on with that font?  It looks like something out of a bootleg Batman comic.  This whole thing is exercise in trying to be different for the sake of being different.  They could have put in the effort to create something that the fans might actually enjoy, but they chose not to.

The Phillies will be wearing these for every Friday night home game of the 2024 season starting with tonight's game against the Pirates.  I'm interested to see how many fans at the ballpark show up in one of these shirts.  I can't imagine any fan over the age of 12 wearing this instead of traditional Phillies gear unless they lost a bet.  If for some reason you did want a t-shirt or a hat, maybe as a gag gift or something, my advice would be to wait until the end of the season clearance sale.  They're going to have a hell of a lot of these things to unload so the discounts should be pretty steep.

It Can't Happen Here, Right?

Civil War
A24 (2024)

The trailer for this movie played before most of the movies that I've seen in the theater over the past few weeks.  For the most part, the footage used in the trailer is limited to a single scene in which Jesse Plemons holds a group of people at gunpoint and demanding to know what kind of Americans they are.  It's a less-is-more approach that I wish more trailers followed.

I expected this to play out like a more realistic version of The Purge with a totalitarian government and a resistance group waging war against them.  That's not quite what happens here.  The only history we get about the executive branch of this world is that the President is serving his third term, he has ordered the bombing of American civilians, and he has disbanded the FBI.  He's definitely not a good guy, but the movie does an incredible job of dancing around the details.  There is absolutely no hint of the political affiliation of the Presidents or the "Western Forces" that oppose him, or any details about how the country fell into a civil war.  It just drops you in the middle of it, and then takes you on a road trip to see how different people and towns are dealing with the situation.

Kirsten Dunst delivers a strong performance as a veteran photojournalist.  Cailee Spaney, Wagner Moura, and Stephen McKinley Henderson round out her group of traveling companions on their way from New York City to Washington DC.  There's a little too much foreshadowing going on in their conversations with each other which spoils some of the story, but it's a movie worth watching.

Second To Nun

The First Omen
20th Century Studios (2024)

Nunsploitation horror flicks seem to be all the rage this Spring.  We saw Immaculate two weeks ago and The First Omen two days ago.  These two movies have a lot in common.  The lead actress in both movies are novices (basically a nun-in-training) who travel from their home in the United States to Italy to work with a Roman Catholic order where they expect that they will soon take their vows.  Both women befriend a fellow young novice in their new home, but they quickly learn that the order isn't all that it seems to be.  Everything else that I want to say would spoil the plot, but the similarities continue to the point where I'd call these films two sides of the same coin.

Immaculate premiered in theaters across the country on March 22nd, and The First Omen followed two weeks later on April 5th.  I'd strongly recommend Immaculate if you're only interested in seeing one of them.  It's a better film with a stronger story and a much better ending.  However if you're not opposed to spending a few hours in the dark with a bunch of creepy nuns, the these two movies would make one hell of a double feature.

As the name suggests, The First Omen is a prequel to the 1976 horror classic The Omen.  It tells the story of how baby Damian came to exist, but reframes the story of his birth in a few ways that I wasn't too crazy about.  The ending felt like it was tacked on to set up a sequel to the prequel.  It seems like the ultimate goal of this film is to kick off a series of new Omen movies that run parallel to the events that take place in the original three films in the series.  I hope that I'm wrong.  This would have been a stronger movie if it had no connection to The Omen series at all.  It's enjoyable as a stand-alone horror movie, but I don't think it works as part of the Damien Thorn story.

Solar Eclipse

This was the best picture that I could get of the full solar eclipse yesterday.  It was taken at 2:41 in the afternoon, about a half hour before totality.  The sky was very cloudy so we'd only get an occasional peek at the sun with the moon moving in at the bottom right.

I was hoping that the sky would clear up a bit by the time it reached full totality, but it got worse.  We weren't able to see even a hint of the sun behind the clouds.

Our friends Susan and Anthony from Lancaster sent us these two photos.  Susan took the one on top, and one of their friends took the one on the bottom.

 

The Sunday Journal - Lorain County, OH  (March 8, 1970)

Dwayne Cameron shared a photo of this newspaper that was published after the last time that the path of totality for a solar eclipse passed over the northeast part of the country.  It was just over ten years before I was born.  The headline referred to the fact that the next show would take place in 2024.  The next time we'll get to see a full solar eclipse in this part of the county is September 14th, 2099.  I've got a hunch that I won't be around to bitch about the cloud coverage for that one.

Professional Wrestling Is Back

Wrestlemania XL
Lincoln Financial Field - Philadelphia, PA
This is the most fun that I've had watching Wrestlemania since I was in elementary school.

There were rumors that Sylvester Stallone was going to be involved, presumably with a Rocky themed introduction to the show or something along those lines.  That didn't end up happening, but there was plenty of Philadelphia injected into the past two nights, both in the ring and from the fans.  From Meek Mill, to the Eagles Luchadores of Jason Kelce and Lane Johnson, to many epic fan signs, this definitely felt like a Philly Wrestlemania.

This sign sums up my thoughts on WWE right now.  I've watched this company's product off and on since I was five years old.  The one consistent thing in all of that time is that whether it was called the World Wrestling Federation or World Wrestling Entertainment, this was a company that couldn't get out of its own way.  No matter how talented the men and women on screen were, the writing was so ridiculous that it stripped the fun out of it.  They create many cool moments, but it usually wasn't long before they'd screw it up with asinine dialogue, or lame attempts at humor, or booking decisions that seem as if they were done deliberately to piss off the audience... and I'm not talking about a heel getting heat.

I'm not going to go into any further detail here because it's a topic that could fill a book and I need to get some sleep.  Suffice to say that enough people who have worked for the company have spoken out, and they paint a pretty clear picture of what was going on.  The company was under the control of an asshole, and that asshole has now been removed from the equation.

All of the matches were enjoyable in different ways, but the things they all had in common is that the stories that were being told made sense.  The commentating sounded fresh and interesting, free from all of the buzz words and typical scripting that used to make every character sound like they were one person speaking in different voices.  The wrestlers seemed to be given more creative freedom with their characters, whether they were on camera during the show or speaking at the press conference at the end of both nights.  If this is the road that this company is going to ride, I'll be riding it with them

Juuuust A Bit Outside

Major League
Paramount Pictures (1989)
This is my favorite baseball movie of all time.  It features the Cleveland Indians as a basement-dwelling team that haven't had a World Series Championship season since 1948.  This was true in real life as well, and is still true to this day.  The team has since changed its name to the Cleveland Guardians and while the team isn't the train wreck that they were back in the 80's, they're considered a longshot to make the post-season in 2024.

The story of Major League is that the Indians owner has deliberately sabotaged her team to drive down attendance so that she can move the club out of Cleveland and to Miami.  Essentially, it's not too much different from what John Fisher is doing with the Oakland Athletics right now, except it's a lot funnier in fiction than it is in real life.

Pottsville Republican - Pottsville, PA  (April 14, 1989)

Times Leader - Wilkes Barre, PA  (April 28, 1989)

Major League premiered in theaters 35 years ago today.  I didn't catch it on the big screen back then, but I more than made up for it in the years that followed.  My dad owned it on VHS when we lived in South Florida, and it's no exaggeration to say that I watched that tape at least a hundred times.  It's my favorite baseball movie of all time, and one of the funniest comedy flicks of the 80's with a seemingly endless list of quotable lines that you'll still hear at ballparks around the country to this day.

Major League - Famicom  (Irem 1989)

2014 Topps Archive

Major League didn't have a video game presence in the United States, but there was a game that was loosely based on the film that was released for Famicom in Japan in the same year that the film was released.  There hasn't been a ton of other merchandise released based on the movie in the years since, but Topps released a pretty cool subset ten years ago that featured Tom Berenger, Charlie Sheen, Corbin Bernsen, Chelcie Ross, Margaret Whitton (along with Pedro Cerrano's friend Jobu) as the characters that they played in the film.